The Nox Anthology - Dark Poets Against Abuse Project
(click here to return to the Nox Table of Contents)

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The Chamber
by Jaeda DeWalt

I have come out of the fog
Penetrating the filthy haze that taints my innocence
No longer a victim of my past
But rather a survivor, fearlessly exploring my future
Releasing myself from these chains of self-hatred
Shedding the shame that has coated my soul
For too many years

Stepping out of this chamber of horrors
In which my mind has been a prisoner
For so long
Lifting off my shoulders the burdens
Of anger and resentment
I have been carrying for this beast

Knowing that though I can never forget
I must forgive the evils
Forced upon my flesh
Rather than grow weak and dependent
I continue to grow resilient and strong

Utilizing challenges of the past
As tools to cope with
The struggles that lie ahead
It is now I let go of the victim inside me
Drinking in the freedom from a past
That will no longer bind me

                                              Copyright Jaeda DeWalt
Red Stains
by Jaeda DeWalt

My mother was a beautiful little girl
forced to wear the red stains of,
early trauma and sexualization.

In the womb I felt her psychic wounds,
feelings buried alive, never die.
The red stains of pain
refusing to wash off,
her porcelain skin.

Here she is surrounded by me,
as the woman for which,
the cycle repeats.

I too, fell victim - to predatory hands.
Marked with red stains,
I became, "Red Jane",
cut with the same knife -
traumatized by the same pain.

I found a way to remove the red stains
from my palest skin.
Beauty for Ashes
set me free.
I wish my mother could discover
the same kind of relief.

                                        Copyright Jaeda DeWalt
Haunted
by Jaeda DeWalt

The eyes do not lie
Weakening the surface of the social masks we wear
A bruised and battered soul can betray the prettiest smile
As the pain sweeps through to the surface
Speaking volumes to our emotions and life experience

                                                          
Copyright Jaeda DeWalt
Jaeda DeWalt is a photographer/digital artist and poet.  She loves unraveling the mysteries of the human  
spirit.  She creates self-portraits, dreamscapes, survivor art, spiritual art, fine art nudes, pride art, and art for
womyn. "Images...poetry...words...they can offer us a feeling, an experience and the magical gift of transport.    
i want my imagery, poetry and voice to give people a way to express themselves, to offer them a moment of
magic and wonder, I want to ignite their imagination, emotions, and give them a sense of connection.  It is my
hope that my images, poetry and voice can serve to be a connecting factor in the universal thread we share."
To view more of Jaeda's creations, please visit her website at:
jaedasfineart.com.
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A Renewal of Life
The poets and artists taking part in this collection have shown an extraordinary commitment to share their visions in the hope
that awareness, combined with the power of artistry,  can help to bring a sense of renewal to those working hard to break free
from abusive environments in their lives.  The displays of their works in these pages have been donated by each artist, and to
thank them for their caring and generosity, a  regular contribution will be made by the editors of this project  to CASA
(Community Action Stops Abuse).
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We deeply thank the contributors to this benefit collection, and ask that visitors respect the copyrights of these generous poets and
artists.  Do not reproduce or distribute any words or images from this site without permission.
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Rape
by Jaeda DeWalt

I often wonder, my precious child
if you will ever forgive me,
for sending you back to heaven prematurely.
Will we meet again...
when I have left this mortal existence
and slipped into your realm?

You entered my body through a violent act.
Your mere presence inside me;
a daily reminder of that horrific night.
That evil man took away my sanctuary.

Not only did he steal my body,
he stole my virtue, my heart and soul.
It has been up to me to piece back together,
the human wreckage he left behind.
I have restructured my identity
and emerged a renewed young woman,
yet my heart is still drawn to your unborn cries.

I now know I can handle any challenge life may give me.
Now it is my hope that God can forgive me,
for sending you back to heaven,
before you even had a chance
to experience mortal existence.
Bless you sweet, innocent child of mine.

                                    
                      Copyright Jaeda DeWalt